My New Spanish Yoga Book

I just released my first yoga book in Spanish! It is a translation of my Yoga Posture Adjustments and Assisting book. Here is the back cover information in Spanish. For the holidays, it is a great gift for Spanish speaking yoga teachers, trainees, or serious yoga students. There are not many books about yoga in Spanish for teachers, so I am delighted to have published one of them!

La primera guía extensa y comprensible para instructores y estudiantes de yoga en español, que incluye todos los detalles sobre cómo ajustar y asistir a alguien mientras realiza una postura de yoga. Con la reciente popularidad que el yoga ha adquirido, este libro es particularmente invaluable para millones de personas que enseñan o practican esta disciplina, pues las claras instrucciones y la generosa cantidad de fotos facilitan a los instructores el aprendizaje y la comprensión para asistir a sus estudiantes. Los estudiantes también pueden utilizar esta guía para profundizar en su práctica personal y aplicar los principios en parejas. Aquí se demuestran y explican las técnicas de ajuste y asistencia para más de 65 posturas, ilustradas con alrededor de 200 fotos.

Usted puede aprender:

* Como ajustar y asistir a alguien mientras realiza una postura de yoga

* Como ejecutar ajustes utilizando mecánicas corporales efectivas

* Múltiples variantes de como ajustar en una postura

* Frases que pueden ayudar a sus estudiantes o parejas/compañeros de yoga

* Maneras de acomodar diferentes tipos de cuerpos

* Como ayudar a sus estudiantes a profundizar en las posturas de manera segura

La comunidad internacional de yoga se beneficiará enormemente con este libro.

“Pienso que tu libro es fabuloso. Tengo muchos libros de yoga, todos reconocidos internacionalmente por algunos de los Yogis más famosos en el mundo. Aún así llevo largo tiempo buscando “este” libro, con simples, aplicables y manejables técnicas para asistir a mis estudiantes mientras realizan posturas. Encuentro tu libro naturalmente amigable sin ser intimidante ni pretencioso. Es una gran herramienta para instructores y estudiantes en entrenamiento. Me gusta mucho el hecho de que tus modelos sean gente “real”; todos con diferentes tipos de cuerpo y niveles variados en su práctica. Me gustaría utilizar tu libro en mi propio programa de entrenamiento”. – Violeta Pastor Wilson, Entrenadora de Instructores de Yoga, Fundadora de la Alianza Canadiense de Yoga.

I Love You, Condition Your Hair.

I bet you are thinking, what the hell does that title mean. Where is she going with this one?

Well, it is a long, long standing tradition that my mother must comment on my hair, for some reason, every time I see her. Even yesterday, after 3 weeks in her hospital bed, in and out of states of delirium and dementia. I hoped that maybe this time the goodnight goodbye “I love you” could just have ended at that…sweet and silent. But noooooo. It STILL had to be followed by a comment about my hair. By the way, I happen to LIKE my hair.

A month ago at my only uncle’s funeral service she just couldn’t help but toss a comment. There I was, feeling pretty and dressed up for the occasion. Hell, even my long lost cousins said I looked great (at 48 this feels like a nice compliment).

Mom turned to look at me. I thought she was going to blurt out something special, deep, or touching. After all, we were at a funeral. But nooooope. She just uttered, “You need to condition your hair.”

And I still felt a sense of shock and wonder, after all these years. Somewhere inside me I know it is coming from her love for me, but it never feels that way when it happens.

The button is still there. There is yet more work to do on my part.
This last time in the hospital I asked more. I am actually becoming intrigued by this phenomenon. It may seem like nothing to you, but it was new for me. “Why are you still so obsessed about my hair?” I asked her. “I remember how it used to be.” She replied. “But I am almost 50 years old now!” I almost shouted. I left the hospital, still astounded by her constant focus on my hair, and even more perplexed by my own reactions.

So, I wonder what the humid, wet, NJ weather will do for my hair tomorrow. I’m going to the hospital to see her.

Let’s see what she has to say.

Letting Go of the Leash

Freedom from the Leash

Letting go of the leash we grip onto leads to spiritual, mental, and emotional health. It frees us and those we love to let go and not hold too tightly. Lyrics to so many songs come to mind as I write this. It may be my most cliche yoga blog yet.

Letting go of the leash applies to our relationships with animals, people, houses, jobs, identities, expectations and sticky attachments of any kind. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that attachment is unhealthy. But I have caused myself much emotional/mental pain and drama in the past, when I clinged too tightly, and have watched my friends suffer immensely.

After almost 3 weeks containing (as per the veterinarian’s suggestion) my recently immigrated kitty Franki from Mexico in our new Lambertville apartment, and walking him on a harness and leash in the yard, I let him go free. In Mexico, he is free to come in and out as he pleases, but he grew up there and knows the turf. He speaks Spanish. Many people told me to keep in inside. “Don’t risk it,” they warned.

For those of you who love animals, you know how tricky this can be, and know the fear of losing your beloved animal forever to unknown dreadful elements in your neighborhood.

I let him out anyway. I wanted us both to be healthy and free.

The first time I let him out he ran up the tree outside the kitchen window, as if to quickly conquer the looming Maple he had been drooling over for three weeks. Then he ran back in. I was delighted. I gave him a treat.

The second time he munched some grass, sniffed a little, and then ran back in. I was delighted. I gave him a treat.

But last night was different. We were both outside in the cool misty rain, and I turned my back for a second – he was gone.

Funny how small things like this can bring back memories of losing other things and people. I lay in bed and noticed the thoughts and little worries, but didn’t buy into them. However, I admit that I got up every half hour to see if he was around, but he wasn’t.

I finally surrendered to sleep with a sense of trust and confidence as I remembered that old, over-used expression, “If you love something let it go, if it comes back, it was meant to be, if not, it wasn’t meant to be with you.” Or something like that.

I suppose in yogic terms I would interpret it more like, “Hey, we are all living out our own karma, our own unique path and destiny. Don’t take it personally if I go.”

After two hours, I woke up and went out to call him again. It was still raining, dark, and cold. He was nowhere in sight. Then after a few minutes he playfully peeked his head over the edge of the second floor rooftop above me and meowed. Running down  two flights of steps and into the kitchen, he was back.

I was delighted. I gave him a treat.

Franki Goes to Lambertville

Swinging Between the Opposites – Hyper and Hypo Thyroid

I am always talking and writing about the opposites in life, so I guess I deserve this. But what an education! The body is so f–king amazing.

Just to make things interesting for me, I got to experience not only the hypo-thyroid state, but also the racing heart, palpitations, breathlessness, anxiety, dizziness, lack of appetite, muscle weakness and aches, and foggy brain of the HYPER thyroid state for a last few weeks. Turns out the dosage the doctor suggested that I start with was way too strong for my body. My blood tests still show up in the hyper range. These hormones will take weeks to get out of my system. It is like being accidentally drugged and waiting for the spell to pass. On the worst days I felt like I was on speed (yes, for those of you wondering, I have done speed before in my youth), but with muscle weakness and fatigue. You have all these things you want to do, and you can’t physically do any of them!

I think it is more uncomfortable than the HYPO thyroidism state that is my general problem. For years I kept the symptoms at bay with amino-acids, acupuncture, Chinese herbs and yoga. Despite my efforts, the hypo-thyroid peaked in the last few months as my thyroid got more dysfunctional. The symptoms were fatigue, extreme dizziness, drunk feelings, slight depression, weakness, aches, and stiffness. Some people gain weight, loose hair, and get dry skin, but my worst symptom was the vertigo-like dizziness that lasted for months (see earlier blog experiences).

It makes me wonder how many people are really NOT mentally anxious or depressed, but are being misdiagnosed. People think they are going crazy when these symptoms start happening. You feel like your body is not yours. Your whole experience of being alive in your body is different. It is very disconcerting.

The American Thyroid Association http://www.Thyroid.org suggests that men and women over 35 get their thyroid hormone levels tested, mainly TSH level, every 5 years!

Who knew? The thyroid and thyroid hormones affect everything and you would die without these hormones. Your muscles use them, your heart, your lungs, the endrocrine system, etc. Without thyroid hormone your muscles, heart and lungs would waste away.

I thought I would pass on this information to plant the idea that your symptoms might not just be in your mind.

Goodbyes

Those last moments together become suspended and frozen in time when we say goodbye. Big, hot sensations and a choking lump overwhelming the throat . The mysteriousness of life saturates the space as we look past the eyes to the souls behind them. Lots of questions flash through the mind about our destiny, chance and fate.

What will the next days, weeks and months hold for us on our separate, but connected journey?

When I see you again who will I be? Will life harden or soften me in the time in between?

And then there is that unsettling emptiness after the departure. A little numb, a little sad; the one left behind returns to the duties of the day while thinking about the talks, the experiences, and the exchanges. The last minute phone calls at the airport seem like a desparate attempt to reassure the connection through space and distance.

Lots of space. Lots of silence. Longing and love, love and longing go together in that Sanskrit chant, “Radhe govinda, govinda radhe.”

That is the WAY of it.

Yoga – Radiant Body, Reverent Breath

What I’d really like to share with you about the yoga practice…

Now for sale my new yoga book for all levels

• Yoga offers you a deeper appreciation of your body –your temple this time around.
• Yoga helps you age gracefully and with dignity.
• Yoga offers us the awareness of who we are – and who we are not.
• Yoga offers us a means to be kinder and more compassionate with ourselves.
• Yoga is more than just touching your toes.
• Yoga is more than fitness. It includes something for all levels of our being: lungs, organs, glands, emotions, mind, spirit, muscles.
• Yoga has the power to bring you into the present moment and accept yourself as you are.
• Yoga is a great way to feel connected in your community.
• Yoga classes are a way of encountering like-minded individuals.
• The breath is more important than the postures.
• Yoga is a friend for life.
• Yoga is the best preventative medicine and it costs nothing!
• Yoga is like a self-therapy and self-massage.
• Yoga is a gift passed on through the ages and never gets old.
• Every time you do a pose or take a breath you do it in a fresh new moment.
• Practicing with friends or loved ones increases understanding, intimacy, and belongingness.
• You can practice yoga on your own by listening to your own innate intelligence -
  that same intelligence that is there to heal your cuts and wounds.
• Yoga transcends race, culture, religion, class, and age.
• You can practice yoga when you are feeling well or not so well.
• Yoga just feels so complete.
• http://www.YogaAtYourWall.com

Sensations of Loss

Heavy heart, weight of my body on the matress, nauseous, waiting for something to happen. Suspended.

Vacant, weepy, wispy, listening to my longer exhalations.

Feeling vulnerable eating alone at the cafe today. Abandoned, but by whom?

I trace the feeling inward and backward, and back, and back, but all I find is pure sensation and a few childhood memories of being home alone sick with strep throat.

Why did I wake up to this today? It’s just a day like any other. The kitten wants to eat, and is trying every mischievous trick he knows to distract me from my pursuit of lonely sensation.

Let the feelings be there.

No strings attached.

No thoughts attached.

Miracles Happen Between Mouth and the Other Hole

Did you ever marvel at the miracle of digestion? The birthday cupcake goes in one hole with pink frosting, spongy yellow cake, and multi-colored sprinkles, and then is magically transformed by the time it reaches the other end of the tunnel. Amazing, isn’t it!!??

My sense of awe began when I heard how many truck loads of food the average human digests (or semi-digests, in the case of some food gulping individuals) in a life time. I looked down at my abdomen with wonder. I imagined dump trucks lined up in the drive way full of all the boring and fancy meals I have eaten. I absolutely know where it all ended up.

Sometimes I get a charge out of of visiting in public restrooms and leaving part of myself there. It seems so odd to me that I could be basically unaware of what was inside me until that moment, and unconsciously consider it to be a part of myself. I feel strangely indebted to these public bathrooms and I am deeply appreciative that they accept my offering, this gift of myself that I leave behind. I shutter to think of all the embarrassing moments they have saved me from!

So, here I am again, thinking about what to eat tonight. I know I have to eat something. I want it to be quick. I have to do this every day and I am not thrilled about that. Don’t get me wrong, I love to eat. It just takes up so much time, money, effort, and mental energy.

It could be worse. Have you ever had a relationship with someone who doesn’t like to eat what you eat, or when, or how you eat? It is a nightmare.

As I mentally plan what I will put into my hole tonight (the one that talks), I count my blessings that I am “soltera” and dealing with the food dilemma on my own. This is one great benefit of being single : -O

Thank You!

Co-existence of Opposites: Blaaah, coooo, blaaah, coooo…

There is a line in an ancient yogic Sanskrit text that goes something like this:

“How is it POSSIBLE that we have forgotten our connectedness, and are pretending to be separate?”

How is it possible? Well, it just is.

And I am sure that even after experiencing a day of unity and camaraderie like yesterday, Obama Day, we may still experience some separateness and isolation today. It is not wrong, it is not bad — it is simply the way it FEELS sometimes on this planet of duality. We have become accustomed to our way of seeing reality and believing the illusion of surface appearances. Part of life’s variety of experience.

Last week , several times actually, I was woken up by the sound of my neighbor vomiting.

Blaaah! Silence. Blaaaaaaah! Silence.

Sound travels freely and easily here in silence of the jungle, and between thatched roof cabins. I lay awake staring at wood beams that are part of my roof. Then, after a minute, in the quiet space between his retching, emerged another completely opposite sound: Coooooo. Soft and comforting. Cooooo…

The sounds began to alternate rhythmically like a call and response chant in a passing parade: Blaaaah! Silence. Coooo. Silence. Blaaaah. Silence. Cooooo. Silence…

The sounds were impeccably timed and so unusual in their seemingly opposite qualities, that the experience took on a surreal quality for me. I recalled music I had heard on a contrived nature sounds CD I bought years ago at a CVS drugstore.

After a while, the vomiting stopped, and so did the song of the bird. Silence again.

Being the pensive type individual I am, and always searching for meaning in the raw, strange, and sweet moments of life, I felt the co-existence of opposites here on my planet.

The sun is coming up. And night would surely fall.

There is some security in that. It is something we can rely on.

Befriend the Opposites

Feline MIA’s

Yesterday I printed out pictures of 2 of my cats and posted them on my refrigerator. They are Missing In Action.

Sylvester, who never misses a meal, has been away for 3 days. Chilloncita, the “little cry baby,” has been gone for over a month. Once I thought Chilloncita was gone forever, but she made a surprise visit after being missing for about 6 weeks. She could quite possibly turn up at any time.

Sylvester never pulls that kind of stunt, and so I am a bit more concerned about him. At the same time, I want to imagine that he is just off in the jungle somewhere, having a long overdue adventure for himself. Maybe he found some great Christmas left overs.

We just never know when the last time is that we will see someone or something. It hits home when their form disappears suddenly. Maybe they are missing, or maybe they just died. It’s like the whole in a donut; the form goes a away and a temporary vacancy is created that is distinct – palpable. It’s almost impossible for the mind to grasp. When I think about it for more than a few minutes, I feel my myself slipping into an altered state of consciousness.

Once I heard an interview with one of the producers of the TV show Seinfeld. He talked about the phenomenon of the “alleyway of power,” or something like that, referring to the doorway in Jerry’s apartment where Kramer, Elaine, and George made their classic entrances and exits that defined there characters. There is a corner of my property at the back right where two walls meet. I think of this corner as the “alleyway of power” for my feline friends.

Bat kitty’s entrance is boisterous and she cries out, “here I am!” At the other end of the entrance spectrum is Pijamas, who tip toes in, careful not to disturb anyone. Sylvester related to the alleyway like a guard at a border crossing. He was in charge of who came in and when. For a while, he was the alpha male around here. That changed recently when velvet black Junio came onto the scene. Over the last few months I noticed Sylvester slithering in silently from the property in the front, not the back, and he did this ever so cautiously and delicately. It was as if he didn’t want to attract attention to himself.

Three days now and no entrances or exits from Sylvester. A bit like a cat myself, I notice and miss his pattern.

After all, it has been 4 years. I hope he comes back, but I am not that confident.

I guess I was secretly hoping that if I posted their photos on the refrigerator, they would sense that and come home.

There were a few times in the past when I thought about Chilloncita, and in the next day or so she would come calling; like when you think about a friend and your cell phone immediately rings and it’s them on the line.

I look longingly at that back right corner.

UPDATE: JANUARY 8, 2009   Sylvester returned! He quietly sat on the edge at the alleyway of power this morning and waited for me to notice him. Unfortunately, he was obviously sick and hadn’t eaten or had a drink for the whole 8 days. I rushed him over to the vet and they began IV and antibiotics. He was completely dehydrated but he still had a lot of life in his eyes, and I am hopeful he will get well. We still don’t know why he left or what caused him to stop eating. He didn’t have a fever, so the vets were puzzled. Thank you to his well wishers who read this blog. As for me, I am still getting over a fever myself.

Last Seen Chilloncita

MIA Sylvester